Tritiated Water is Good for You

No good deed goes unpunished in liberal-land.

Take Vermont's best corporate citizen, Entergy. Not only have they safely and reliably provided power and jobs to Vermont for decades, local citizenry in the state's southeast corner are potentially being treated to a bonus, courtesy of the 40-years-young Vermont Yankee nuclear plant: tritiated water.

But like all good things, the liberals in Montpelier are doing everything they can to keep the residents of Vernon from having the opportunity to appreciate this largess.

Far from the scary boogeyman the left would make tritium and other leaking radioactive byproducts to be, tritium is replete with benefits. For example, tritiated water administered in drinking water to rats throughout pregnancy produced significant decreases in relative weights of brain, testes, and ovaries of newborns. Clearly, this gives local residents a unique tool in the struggle to keep children from becoming overweight.

Perhaps of even greater benefit, beta radiation from the decay of tritium has been shown to induce specific-locus mutations in sperm. Now it stands to reason that some of those mutations could be beneficial, yes? Perhaps super-strength, or the power of flight. And even the less-advantageous mutations could well spur a re-igniting of the side show industry - at a time when the economy has been so sullied by frivolous social programs and meddlesome environmental regulation.

Windham County residents are truly lucky to have such a resource beneath their feet. Why, we at Vermont Tigger would love to rush to sell our homes in northern Vermont and move down there to partake ourselves, but, you know... we've got a thing...